All is Vanity

He wears a hat with a hard tight rim,
But a hearing aid headband? Not for him!
Her earrings pinch and they're as big as dollars,
But a tiny ear piece? “No!” She hollers.
His pockets bulge with a horrid litter,
He hasn't room for a small transmitter.
She squints and scowls with the strain she brooks,
But she's sure that an aid would “spoil her looks.”
Vanity, vanity, all is vanity.
And vain is aid for vain humanity.
— Gene Ellinger, 1949.